50 Shades of I Don’t Get It: Fifty Shades of Grey (2015) Review

The movie begins abruptly, rather lazily, jumping to the interview scene between Grey and Anastasia without preview to the characters’ background. I have read few pages of E.L James’ so-called “work” and find it atrocious and the film is not far behind. The plot of 50 Shades of Grey is little to none. The movie’s marketing sells this BDSM-theme as passionate, seductive or even romantic (released on Valentines Day!). Where else, they should sell the movie as vapid, horrifying and drivel. Vapid because Anastasia and Christian are the most boring couple on-screen who performs uh-oh dangerous sex in red room and fly helicopters on their spare times. Horrifying because the movie glorifies Emotional Manipulation to such an extent that any rational human being should not tolerate it.

Watch closely, when Anna wanted to “understand” the handsome billionaire (because that’s what poor college girl need to do), he will swing the conversation around. He will say things like, “I don’t make love. I fuck… hard” or “I don’t do romance. My tastes are very singular. You wouldn’t understand,” to draw her in. Cleverly the psychopathic hero will compensate his deeds with words like, If you do this, I will be devoted to you, and only you.” And drivel because what do I take out of this? I come from those rare breed of cinema-goers who demand high standard of entertainment. I love Love stories in movies and this is not one of them. Remember that love is compassionate and freeing, not possessive and self-loathing.

It’s easy to dismiss my paranoia for this film’s abusive shade by reminding me this is a work of fiction. And perhaps you are right, but the fact that movie like Fifty Shades actually existed gives us a better understanding that films are not a medium for mere entertainment without no strings attached. In truth, Fifty Shades of Grey is Erika Mitchell’s (E.L James) pathetic attempt to make money on consensual and unfamiliar BDSM practices, where she repackaged it as seductive and edgy love story. To my understanding, BDSM is a stimulating sexual practice that do not define the doers; Christian Grey’s alarming dominance both occupies inside and outside his bedroom.

British woman director Sam Taylor-Johnson’s direction looks amateur and coarse. Several adequate (not classy!) sex scenes with an overall aimless narrative. Actor Jamie Dornan should have kept his beard maybe that will make his acting less painful. While Dakota Johnson is actually quite good as the foolish Anastasia Steele; she made her bearable to an extent.

The first law of Economics indicates that where there is demand there will be supply. It’s easy to blame Universal, producer Michael De Luca and author E.L James for this assemble, but shouldn’t we blame the people? Fifty Shades of Grey become this supposed phenomenon because we give it a chance. We got curious. We talk about it. We watch (or download its illegal torrents) even though we know it will be shitty. In the end, however, we need to realize that we have the power to say yes or no to the movies we watch, not Hollywood.


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